Alchemy (Intelligence)

Those in search of a way to turn lead into gold are not the only practitioners of the science of alchemy. On alchemist’s tables and apothecaries across the world charlatans, has-beens and the odd genuine genius seek ways to make money by promising people better lives and invertebrate free pubes.

An alchemist can make the following concoctions: Sensitivity crème, lubricant jelly, extra-strong delouser, orcish fly and hot flush.

Sensitivity crème, when rubbed into a body part increases the sensitivity of the nerve endings. If rubbed into the fingertips you gain a +1 bonus on any non-combat task related to dexterity. If used for its intended purpose the crème leads to enhanced pleasure, lots of giggling and messier sheets than normal. Creating the crème requires a successful Alchemy(Int) check (DC 15) and costs 1gp per dose. The effects of a dose of sensitivity crème last for 15 minutes, and each dose typically goes for around 5gp on the open market.

Lubricant jelly, when used for its conventional purpose allows easier access to ‘parts unknown’ but it can also be smeared around small openings or on bonds, giving a +1 bonus to Escape Artist (Dex) checks. Creating a dose of lubricant jelly requires a successful Alchemy(Int) check (DC 12) and costs 1gp. Each does typically fetches 4gp on the open market, and the jelly is normally sold in batches of three for 10gp.

Extra-strong delouser, when dusted onto the hairy parts of the anatomy instantly kills any bloodsucking arthropods attached thereto. If ingested it causes stomach cramps and vomiting unless the character makes a successful Constitution save (DC 12). If a vermin of Medium-size or smaller ingests it they die instantly unless they succeed at a Constitution save (DC 18). Creation of each dose of this foul-smelling powder requires a successful Alchemy(Int) Check (DC 15) and costs 5gp. A single dose of this powder usually fetches around 10gp on the open market, although it never sells well unless there is a sudden epidemic of parasites.

Hot flush is a prank concoction often poured into the drinks of unsuspecting women. Within minutes of consumption, the imbiber will get very warm, flushed and sweaty, possibly needing to strip off a little in order to get cool unless they make a successful Fortitude save (DC 12). Creating a dose of hot flush requires a successful Alchemy check (DC 8) and costs 5sp. Although(Int) it is not usually found on the open market, being more of a concoction that a prankster would use against a fellow student than a useful one, a dose can still fetch around 1gp from those with the intention to use it.

Orcish fly is a powerful aphrodisiac concocted from various strange ingredients. It was noted that orcs rarely suffered from erectile dysfunction and were always willing and able to mate with species not their own, as has been evidenced by the large number of half-orcs scattered about the world. Orcish fly attempts to induce the same carefree capability exhibited by orcs in those who use it. If rubbed onto an area of flesh, this vaporous liquid causes blood to rush to the surface causing swelling and increased sensitivity. If imbibed it causes a mild fever. Creation of a dose of orcish fly requires a successful Alchemy(Int) Check (DC 15) and costs 10gp due to the obscurity of the reagents. A single dose of this potent liquid can usually fetch as much as 20gp on the open market.